A Hunger That Mere Food Won't Satisfy

Ever wanted something so much, so badly, so passionately that doing without it hurts to the very core of your heart, your soul and your mind?

I have been feeling that kind of longing for the past several weeks, with doubts about whether I would actually make it home to Kentucky for Christmas. I miss my mommy. I also miss my other family members, but the bond with my mother is extremely strong. The bond has been stretched this year. I have only seen her a couple of times, which is unusual.

In a recent conversation, she asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told her that the gift of spending time with her and my other kin folk in Kentucky was far more valuable to me than anything material. God willing, I will be home for Christmas. My flight is scheduled for 6am on Monday morning.

For the past several years, I have had a recurring dream of being in an airplane that is taking off. After liftoff, the plane never gets more than a few feet off the ground because of power lines or bridges or other obstacles. Last night, though, that airplane of my dreams soared high without any hindrance. Dream interpretation is not a strength of mine, so I have no idea what this means. But I woke up, smiled at the change in my subconscious and went back to sleep. It was some of the best sleep I have had in recent memory.

I'll be home for Christmas. Not just in my dreams. And come December 30, I'll be back in New York, ready for a new year that must be better than this one. It certainly couldn't be worse.